


A thousand kisses

by Magal



Category: K-pop, Shinhwa
Genre: Angst, Awkward Kissing, Boys Kissing, Character Study, Drunken Kissing, First Kiss, Fluff, French Kissing, Kissing in the Rain, M/M, Neck Kissing, Platonic Kissing, Rough Kissing, Surprise Kissing, True Love's Kiss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-26
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-04-23 10:03:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4872628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magal/pseuds/Magal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of angsty and fluffy kisses~ One kiss leads to a second, then a third, then another one, and another one~</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Surprise kiss

**Author's Note:**

> Helloooo again! :D
> 
> Okay, silly idea I guess, but I'm back with a new series of drabbles/short chapters. The concept is in the title~
> 
> I'll try to update once every week at least. 
> 
> Happy reading! ^^

The first time they kiss, it's an accident. 

Shinhwa has been recording a tv show for hours now with some other kpop groups, and they're all exhausted. It's getting late, and thinking of his bed, Hyesung sighs inwardly when Junjin, Eric and him are told to stand in a circle for the next game. He does as he's told without complaining however. The sooner the recording is over, the quicker he'll be in his bed. 

Next to him, Eric looks as tired as him as they prepare for the kissing game, listening to the staff's instructions. The friends share an encouraging look before they start to compete against the other team of idols, but Hyesung's small smile waver a little at Eric's intense eyes on him. 

"What?" He asks in a whisper when Eric doesn't stop staring at him.

Eric only shrugs, and Hyesung doesn't insist. 

They start playing. As it often happens in this game – or rather, as it is expected to happen, the thin piece of paper eventually falls off from Hyesung's lips when he has no room left in his lungs to suck the air in, and his lips crush Eric's when he turns to give him the invisible paper. 

They kiss. Softly but firmly, square on the lips because Hyesung didn't realize he lost the paper until he felt his bare lips against his.

The sudden spark it provokes in Hyesung's body sends his heart into a frenzy, and the poor thing immediately starts to beat crazily. Hyesung leans back and their shocked eyes meet briefly. The singer is very well aware of the fact that this will be on camera, and feeling tense about it, he does his best to control his outward reaction and play it cool. 

Averting his eyes and taking immediately another piece of paper from Junjin, he blushes a little when he hears a few giggles from the members of the SM girl group who are watching on the side, but he realizes soon that nobody really cares. It's just a game, and on set, everyone – the other Shinhwa members included – is too tired and distracted at this late hour to even tease them about it. 

He's nervous every time they exchange a new piece of paper, feeling all too well the lips he just kissed below the thin fabric, but they finish the game without any other incident, and afterwards, they don't mention it between each other. Even so, the atmosphere is very awkward between them and they keep avoiding each other's eyes, sitting far away from the other on the ride home of the group to the SM dorms. 

Alone in his bedroom, Hyesung is restless. He can't stop thinking about the kiss even when he slips into his bed later on. The burning sensation of Eric's lips lingers on his, making his mouth tingle. Sure, it's not his first kiss but he suddenly realizes that it is the first time of his life that he kisses a man.

He can't stop thinking about Eric's dark eyes either, nor the way Eric's hand was gripping his arm through the whole game, as if he feared that he would run away from him. 

In the darkness of his bedroom, Hyesung suddenly hides his red face behind his hand and roll over in his bed, groaning loudly. "Argh! It's so stupid!" 

He hides his face against the pillow and sighs. He doesn't know why he's so disturbed about the whole thing. After all, it was just an accident really, just a game, and probably his first and last time kissing another guy. He's only embarrassed because Eric and he are close and kissing a friend is weird. 

It certainly explains why he keeps thinking about such a tiny little kiss and why his belly feels funny when he remembers the strange way Eric looked at him after it. 

He groans again, pitifully.

It doesn't explain why he has butterflies in his stomach when he wonders what a second kiss with the beautiful man would feel like.

TBC...


	2. Drunken kiss

The second time they kiss, they're in a bar with the members and some other friends, and they're completely drunk. 

Hyesung would be lying to himself if he didn't admit he actually likes the way they're both flirting with each other, sharing soft gazes, giggles and lingering touches in their own bubble. Well, it's not exactly _flirting_ , he tells himself, correcting his inebriated thoughts. It's just the alcohol's effects, making the usually shy young men act more comfortably with each other. 

Indeed, Hyesung's head is pleasantly spinning from all the soju he drank that evening and he knows that Eric is equally drunk from the way he keeps leaning in close to speak to him, their faces mere centimeters apart. He's also very much aware that the young man has been eyeing his mouth for a while, and even if it's weird, the singer finds himself craving for a kiss. Even a cuddle would do. 

He blames the alcohol and his recent celibacy. Yeah, it must be because he broke up with Soo Young – his girlfriend for two years – just a couple of weeks ago and he needs the attention to compensate, he tells himself again as Eric touches his hair. 

"What are you thinking about?" Eric wonders out loud. 

Hyesung doesn't answer, eyes dreamily riveted to Eric's handsome face. They keep staring at each other in silence, and soon, the other members pick up on their flirty behavior and start to tease them about the 'ricsyung couple'. It's becoming a thing among their weirdest fans, and if Hyesung finds it deeply annoying – Eric and he are just best friends and two men can't love each other anyway, _duh_ –, it seems to amuse their friends to no end. 

So when Hyesung sighs and tells them tiredly to shut up, none of them seems to listen.

"Stop eye-fucking each other and just kiss already!" Minwoo dares them to do. 

Everybody laughs around them. This time, Hyesung swears loudly and pushes Minwoo in retaliation, but he challengingly leans towards Eric, locking their lips for a short but firm kiss. Eric is frozen at first, but when Hyesung starts to pull back, he's quick to grab his neck to pull him in another, longer kiss. 

The other members cheer loudly when it happens but soon wrinkle their noses and shout in mock disgust after a few seconds when the second peck lingers and wet tongues obviously meet. 

But Eric doesn't break their kiss, his soft lips taking their sweet time to taste his mouth, so Hyesung doesn't care.

When they lean back, they're flushed, both laughing about the dare along with the other members. But they can't look at each other's eyes for the rest of the evening. 

***

_A few weeks later..._

"Who have you kissed since the beginning of this year?"

No one speaks at first, even though they know the answer for each one of them. Even though they know Eric and he last kissed each other, not a long time ago. 

Nobody has brought up the subject again since it happened and it bothers Hyesung somehow, considering that he can't help but think about it everyday for some odd, mysterious reason. 

Hyesung doesn't look up but a glance out of the corner of his eye is enough to realize he isn't the only frustrated one. From the way Eric is staring at him since the question popped up, Hyesung knows the kiss is still on his mind too, and as every time he catches the handsome man stealing a glance at him, the singer is strangely pleased about it. 

Smoothly, Junjin tries to make up a believable lie when Hyesung suddenly decides to speak up, to the other members' surprise. He just wants to tease the rapper. 

"I can answer that question."  
"Is it something you did with a member?" Minwoo immediately wonders, feigning innocence.

All the members have a knowing grin, and Hyesung tries not to snort. He's surprised and attentive when Eric joins in the conversation. 

"If it was a member, then we will all go have a drink," Eric promises while staring at him, smiling a little but looking nervous too.

Staring back at him with soft eyes, Hyesung laughs then takes his mike. 

"It was not a 'she', but a 'he'," the singer admits, faking coyness. "We drank too much so we kissed."

His shy but at the same time proud, cheeky looking smile at the confession suddenly makes the atmosphere very awkward. Looking shocked, the male interviewer stutters, and Dongwan intervenes to try and lighten things up. 

"Who was it?"  
"It was Eric," Hyesung answers with fake nonchalance, noticing how quiet Eric remains.  
"Oh, right."

The awkwardness is still palpable in the room though, and Eric fidgets in his seat, looking very uneasy.

"It was a good chance and there was a good atmosphere, so we kissed," he clumsily tries to explain to the dumbfounded interviewer.

Afterwards, Eric tries to make eye contact with Hyesung but the singer nervously avoids his stare until the end of the interview, wondering if his little joke was a good idea after all. 

***

Seeming in deep thoughts, Eric doesn't speak at all to him after that, doesn't even look at him once, and confused by his icy behavior, Hyesung feels too shy to talk to him first. Was the rapper really mad at him?

When they're back at their dorm, about two hours later, Eric grabs his wrist the minute they're alone in their shared bedroom.

"Why did you have to talk about _that_ in an interview?" he asks him coldly, without preamble. 

His sharp words and his dark eyes are full of reproach, and surprised at his unexpected outburst, Hyesung is momentarily speechless, destabilized to see how mad at him Eric actually is. He is also a little bit hurt to hear in his voice how ashamed of their kiss he seems to be, refering to it with a spiteful 'that'. 

"Simply because it is the truth." It really was. Hyesung hasn't kissed anyone else since 'that'. "I just answered the question for fun anyway," he adds defensively. "What is your problem? It was just a drunken kiss, nobody cares!" 

Eric just glares at him for a moment but weirdly, his eyes seem more sad than anything when he speaks again a few seconds later. 

"Don't do that next time, it's not good for Shinhwa."

Without saying anything else, he lets go of his wrist, and ignoring him, walks up to his bed, plopping heavily on the mattress and sighing loudly. 

Hyesung stares at Eric's back for a while, gripping his own wrist. His skin burns where Eric's fingers touched him, but he suddenly feels cold inside. 

He wants to slip into the bed next to the rapper, hug him and kiss his cheek to apologize to the Shinhwa leader, but he's not drunk today and he feels like he's not allowed to do this sort of things in his sober state. It seems like a too intimate thing to do after everything that happened between them. It would be too... awkward. Who knows, Eric might even be disgusted by such behavior now and push him away? 

Still...

Hyesung slips quietly into his own bed a few minutes later, and as he listens to Eric's soft snores, lulling him to sleep, he can't help but think about his words, again and again. 

_Don't do that next time..._

_Next time..._

What did he mean by that? Next interview or...? 

_Kiss._

Hyesung blushes, tugging at his pillow. It's silly. There probably won't be a 'next time' anyway. It's not like they're going to smooch each other on a regular basis, _duh_. Men don't do that with each other.

In his dreams though, as confusing as it is, they do.

TBC...


	3. Angry kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see. ^^;;;
> 
> Sorry!! D:  
> I really meant to update this earlier but got caught up in real life. 
> 
> Happy holidays everyone! ^^

The third time they kiss, it's out of anger. 

Hyesung has been watching Eric and Minwoo out of the corner of his eyes for the last hour. They're in a room full of people, getting prepared for an interview. As a noona is silently doing his hair and make-up, he keeps throwing glances in his friends' direction, getting irritated as they laugh softly at what looks like private jokes, talking and playing video games on their consoles. 

It is obvious that Eric and Minwoo have been getting closer these past few weeks. Hyesung wouldn't have minded to share his best friend with the main dancer if he hadn't discovered a disturbing thing that had happened mere days before. 

They had kissed, Minwoo had randomly admitted in an interview. Minwoo and Eric had kissed because the weird leader had wanted to know exactly how it felt to kiss a man, for real. 

_For real._

With that thought, Hyesung's eyes narrow when Minwoo suddenly hugs Eric, both members laughing their asses off. 

Weren't they a little too close? Two men weren't supposed to behave that way. They weren't supposed to kiss each other either. Despite his thoughts, Hyesung can't help but imagine the scene, over and over again, and as every time, he feels an unexpected anger when he pictures them kissing slowly, in a romantic atmosphere. 

Disgusting. 

Hyesung's nose wrinkles. When he looks up to watch the pair again, deep dark eyes are staring at him. Eric's still face seems to judge him somehow and after staring back for a few seconds, Hyesung averts his eyes. 

He is definitely not blushing at being caught staring. 

***

About an hour later, the interview ends and Hyesung's anger has not abated, quite the contrary. He can't help but stare again and roll his eyes as Eric and Minwoo giggle once again. He averts his eyes, furious to be distracted by the pair. It is ridiculous after all, isn't it? It's not like he is jealous or anything. Eric can kiss whoever the hell he wants, girl or boy, he doesn't care.

But when they're asked to pose for a few photos, Hyesung seizes the opportunity to take his revenge. 

He doesn't even know why he acts so childishly, why he needs to make a spectacle of himself, but he gloats inwardly when he sees the clearly displeased, disapproving little frown on Eric's face as he openly flirts with Junjin. 

His baby bird doesn't seem to mind though when his mommy bird leans in to peck him and he even goes along with the joke until Eric grabs the younger man's hair before their lips touch, making him cry out in pain.

"What are you doing motherfucker?" Eric warns Junjin with a low voice. "That's disgusting."

Pouting, Junjin doesn't reply. It's surely better this way. The leader can be scary sometimes.

On the other hand, Hyesung stares challengingly at Eric until he stares back, eyes dark and intense, but none of them says anything. 

***

When they're back at the dorm, that's an entirely different story. The other members have left to meet with some trainees, letting their two hyungs head first to their flat and prepare the dinner. And as Hyesung expected, as soon as they're alone, Eric just won't shut up. 

"What was that?" Eric asks him for the umpteenth time as he keeps following him like a mad puppy in the empty corridor that leads them to the Shinhwa quarters.

Sighing, Hyesung rolls his eyes and finally turns around to glare at him as he opens the door.

"What was _what_?"  
"You know what I'm talking about," Eric answers, glaring back at him.  
"No I don't."

Walking briskly towards their small kitchen, Hyesung ignores him again, and after shutting the door, the leader follows him inside, swearing angrily. 

"I already told you not to do that! It isn't good for Shinhwa!"

Flabbergasted at his obvious double standards, Hyesung snorts loudly and turns around abruptly. Eric stops dead in his tracks but they're already nose to nose. Their eyes momentarily widen at their sudden proximity but Hyesung's anger quickly helps him recover.

"What? I can't do what?" he nearly spats.  
"You just can't kiss a member on set on a whim," Eric finally says. "Is that so hard to understand?"  
"You're the one to talk! I can't kiss Junjin but you can kiss Minwoo, huh?"

Hyesung is secretly satisfied when Eric momentarily looks like he has been punched in the stomach, but it doesn't last. 

"It's different," the leader argues, still staring at him and stuttering a little. "I- I didn't kiss him live during an interview. Why would you do that?"  
"Why would I? I can't believe it," Hyesung scoffs incredulously to his face. "I can't kiss him as a joke but you kissing Minwoo for real and bragging about it to everyone is okay? Really?" 

Eric doesn't answer immediately, seeming somewhat uneasy. 

"It wasn't like that. I- I didn't think Minwoo would actually talk about it. It was just... an experiment of sorts."  
"An experiment of sorts?" Hyesung repeats mockingly, arching his eyebrows. "For what purpose?"  
"I just needed to know... to compare..." Eric hesitates, avoiding his eyes.

Hyesung isn't sure if he really wants to know why Eric wanted to experiment with Minwoo but he waits for an explanation anyway. Eric doesn't continue his sentence though, and the singer's irritation rises again.

"Whatever. Kiss whoever you want, I don't care."

He tries to leave again, upset by their conversation and feeling suddenly hungry for food, when Eric firmly grabs his arm and takes a step forward, making Hyesung step back against the wall. The leader's eyes are so dark and his stare so intimidating that Hyesung instantly bites back the spontaneous insult coming up his throat. 

"Do you?" Eric asks, staring hard at him. 

He takes another step forward, their bodies slightly touching, and this time, Hyesung fights back the urge to wriggle out of the trap he's fallen into. Their red, angry faces are close, and the building tension as they look at each other is quickly suffocating Hyesung but he doesn't look away, too proud to lower his glare first. 

"Fuck off."

But Eric doesn't move, nor does Hyesung. He doesn't want to be the first to yield, even if he feels like he's slowly losing. Eric's serious, handsome face is totally mesmerizing up that close. The singer blushes even more and his stare wavers a little, confused at that thought.

Eric seems to notice the slight hesitation and takes the opportunity to lean forward and kiss him, hard. His hands grasp Hyesung's hips, trapping him completely against the wall. 

Hyesung is flushed and shocked at the unexpected, heated kiss, and even though his first reaction is to kiss him back as hard, biting at the invading lips, he grabs both of Eric's upper arms, tense and ready to push him away. 

He doesn't though as the kiss lingers and deepens, soon becoming more passionate than angry as the battle of their tongues slowly turns into an impatient, steamy dance.

Barely a couple of minutes later, they're still in the same shy position, their hands moist and kissing hungrily, when the front door opens and shuts noisily, the other members entering the dorm and chattering happily. As struck by lightning, they both start at the noise and separate at once, hastily going to grab some plates and ingredients to prepare their dinner. 

They automatically turn their back to each other, respectively hunched over the sink and table at opposite sides of the room as if nothing had just happened, but Hyesung's hands visibly shake and he's completely flustered. He leans forward, hoping that his long hair can hide his blushing cheeks and red bitten lips. His heart is beating so crazily fast he's dizzy, petrified at the thought that the others might have seen them.

The thick atmosphere doesn't elude the other members as they enter the small kitchen a few seconds later and look at their deadly silent friends, Minwoo and Junjin shivering theatrically at the awkward aura surrounding them. 

"Are you really fighting _again_ , hyungs? What is it this time?" Andy sighs tiredly when it is clear that the pair won't even look at each other, their faces a deep red in – what he thinks is – anger. 

Neither Eric nor Hyesung answer.

TBC...


	4. Stolen kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by one of Andy's story. ;D

The fourth time they kiss, it's the beginning and the end of something, Hyesung just doesn't know what yet. 

Hyesung nearly knocks his head against the corridor wall as he walks into the dorm. He's totally tipsy, having spend the night out with Kangta, heavily drinking. 

He drank so much alcohol he nearly poured out his deepest worries to his friend. But even his drunken state, he realized he can't do that. Even though there's only _that_ on his mind and it's been driving him crazy, how could he explain _that_ and expect some advice? Kangta would certainly thinks he's a freak.

Andy peeks at him from the kitchen, soon followed by all the other Shinhwa members – minus Eric, all seeming way too amused at his current state, and Hyesung throws them an unfocused but powerful glare as he staggers into his room, hoping that they'll get his "don't you dare annoy me now" message. 

He's tired and moody, mentally exhausted, and he doesn't want to talk to anyone. Well, he has been feeling that way for the last two weeks. Since _that_ event. 

He closes the door, ignoring the giggles and weird, quick shuffle sounds behind it, and he freezes as he switches on the dim light of the small bedroom – he's had his own since a while now – and his glassy eyes fall onto the sleeping bundle on his single bed. 

"What the..."

He curses under his breath and maybe trembles a little, his heart suddenly pounding in his chest.

Wrapped in thin blue sheets, Eric is lying on _his_ bed. 

They haven't talked once since they shared that angry kiss, mostly because Hyesung has been carefully avoiding the leader, feeling too shy to break the awkward atmosphere and ask for a clear explanation. 

The singer is also sure their eyes haven't met once either, even if he would inwardly admit that he's been stealing more secret glances towards the handsome man now than ever. 

Hyesung's throat constricts a little as his eyes get their fill of the sight before him – Eric does look kinda cute when he's sleeping – but he soon snaps out of his trance, his fists tight and a scowl on his face. 

"Yah! Mun Junghyuk! What are you doing in my bed?" 

Eric looks definitely sound asleep, and Hyesung walks to the bed to shake his shoulder, more gently than it should to be really effective.

"Wake up!" he hisses. "Who gave you the permission to sleep here? Don't you have your own bed?" 

He rants for a few minutes, scolding the leader for his outrageous boldness, but Eric doesn't even budge. Behind the door, he can hear some laughs and he makes a pause to glare at the closed door, staring suspiciously at the keyhole for a while, before looking at the sleeping man again, sighing loudly. 

"Why won't you wake up? You're so annoying," he complains, plopping down next to the bed on the hard floor, his back against the bedside furniture. 

He's silent for a while, listening to Eric's soft breathing and his head still buzzing from all the alcohol he drank that night. He stares at the floor. 

"I don't understand you. Are you trying to make me go crazy? I'm tired of all your stupid tricks."

He mumbles something about the leader being inconsiderate, then he rants again, whining about Eric's numerous, lame jokes, all targeted at him. After a while, he realizes that the list is awfully long, and it makes him pause again. 

"Thinking about it, I wonder how we even get along in the first place," he blurts out, pouting childishly. 

Of course, Eric doesn't answer, and Hyesung is more displeased than ever with the bed thief.

"You know, Kangta is way nicer than you," he mutters again. "Actually, everyone is. Why are you always trying my patience? Huh? What did I do to you to deserve such treatment?"

Hyesung turns his head, noticing at the corner of his eye the subtle little frown suddenly forming between Eric's eyebrows. After staring at it for a moment, Hyesung gently presses the tip of his index finger on the knot. Eric's muscles relax gradually and Hyesung can't resist to run his finger on his nose, caressing it slowly until the tip. 

"I'm sorry I avoided you lately. It's just, you're so..."

Leaning on the mattress, Hyesung blushes, thinking about their steamy kiss, and his fingers slide on Eric's cheek on their own accord, caressing his skin. He lays his head on one arm, his nose mere centimeters away from the handsome, captivating face. He had never noticed how pretty Eric's eyelashes are. His finger touches the corner of Eric's mouth distractedly and he withdraws his hand immediately when he finally realizes what he's doing.

"... frustrating and you're getting on my nerves sometimes," he finishes hastily. "But it's not that I don't like you. You're my best friend," he assures him.

The walls are thin and Hyesung's whispers are obviously too loud because he can hear the other members cooing over his words behind the door. He ignores them. 

"I'm thankful to have you. You're always there when I need you."

It's true. Eric is always there to reassure him – and scold him about his lack of confidence – when Hyesung is anxious, worrying and panicking over – basically – everything. 

With that thought, the singer starts babbling again, more or less coherently, whining about his latest worries and fails. Did Eric think their fans noticed how many times he messed up their latest choreography? Wasn't he a little off-key today at their rehearsal? He hasn't call his baby brother in more than a week because they have been so busy, won't he be mad at him?

Hyesung goes on and on like this, getting everything off his chest for a good half-an-hour, and even if Eric hasn't answered a single question, the singer feels a little better, talking to him. Everything is quiet around them, and the other members obviously left at some point, certainly bored by the lead singer's whiny, endless monologue. 

Sighing, Hyesung finally stands up and walks to the nearby closet, rummaging for his pyjamas and some bed clothing. Then, after switching off the lights, he changes into his night clothes and walks back to the bed with a yo mattress and two blankets, setting a temporary bed on the floor next to his bed. When it's ready, he takes the extra blanket, laying it carefully on a shivering Eric. 

"Why steal my bed if you won't even use a blanket?" Hyesung mutters admonishingly. "Idiot. Are you trying to catch a cold?"

He tucks him in, gently patting the blanket all over the sleeping man. He's on his knees, the upper half of his body leaning over the bed mattress, and he's surprised when he feels Eric's steady breath on his face, realizing how close they must be. 

He hesitates, but once again, his hand seems to move on his own accord, fingertips grazing Eric's cheek in the dark. This time, they don't stop, audacious enough in the quiet atmosphere to caress the leader's mouth softly, longingly. 

"Eric," he calls. "I have something else to tell you."

He waits for a moment, both hoping and fearing that the leader might wake up this time, but Eric doesn't answer, and maybe because he isn't completely sober yet, Hyesung just let himself be honest for once. He'll feel guilty later. 

"I think I like you," he murmurs. 

He doesn't hesitate much before giving in to the temptation. After all, he barely has to lean a little more in to kiss him. A chaste and gentle kiss with a sweet and bitter aftertaste. 

He leans back after a moment, pausing only for a few more seconds to pensively stare at the dark figure before sliding under his own blanket. 

He's soon drifting into sleep, with the befuddled sensation of fingers brushing his hair in the dark.

***

When Hyesung wakes up in the morning, saying that he is cranky is an understatement. 

His head is killing him, his face is bloated, his back feels stiff from sleeping on the floor, and he remembers exactly why he couldn't sleep on his precious bed. He gets up, glaring at the crumpled sheets and shuffles sleepily towards the kitchen for breakfast. 

All the other members are already there, eating and talking animatedly, and Hyesung's grumpy face doesn't go unnoticed. 

"What happened to you, Hyesung hyung? You look like you slept all night on the floor!" Junjin teases him. "Did someone steal your bed?"

Hyesung glares at his fellow members as they all erupt in laughter. Only Eric is quiet, staring at his food, and the singer is immediately pissed off with him. 

"Next time, don't sleep in someone else's bed," he tells him coldly as he sits down in front of him. 

The laughters die at once, and no one dares to even talk until Eric shyly looks up. 

"Hyesungie, I like you too."

At these words, Hyesung's heart starts beating crazily and he immediately searches for Eric's eyes. They meet for the first time in what seems like forever, and it's a little bit awkward but he's suddenly more terrified by the meaning of a few simple words than their previous kiss. 

Is it possible that Eric might have heard him? Is it possible... that Eric might have not been asleep the whole time? What about the kiss? Could he remember it? No, there was no way. 

Next to them, the other members look shocked for a moment too, but it doesn't last.

"Omo, were you only pretending to sleep?" Junjin exclaims cheerily. "It makes sense now."  
"Ah, I also wondered how Eric could sleep through it," Dongwan says.  
"Well, how could he have? Hyesung was so loud! He just doesn't know how to properly whisper," Minwoo merciless states with a chuckle.  
"So, Eric hyung, were you awake the whole time? Did you hear everything?" Andy asks the leader eagerly. 

Eric nods in answer, while staring back intensely at Hyesung with a tiny, timid smile.

"Yes. Everything," he says, slowly. 

Realizing what it implies, the singer feels numb. How could he not notice and make a fool of himself? Hyesung flushes, his puffy face going beet red and making everyone laugh once again. 

No one understands why the oil and water couple gets even more awkward after that day. 

TBC...


	5. The kiss

The next time they kiss, years have passed.

Hyesung is barely disturbed in his task as the gentle breeze of the sunny spring day goes through the open window to caress his face. He sticks out his tongue at the corner of his mouth in concentration, and soon, a pitiful groan can be heard next to him. 

"Argh! Hyesung, you little shit. I didn't see that coming," Minwoo complains loudly, throwing away his gamepad in frustration. 

His character on the screen just died, abandoned during a fight by his two companions to the hands of an ugly monster as Hyesung went to help Eric's avatar instead of him. A merciless chuckle immediately follows as the dancer lays back on the couch, pouting.

"That's just payback for the other day," Eric states innocently. 

It's the second time they meet at Hyesung's place this week to play video games, but the dancer isn't lucky today. Minwoo frowns when he sees the shadow of a smirk on Eric's face and he glares at the leader on his right, before twirling around on his left.

"And you! You! Why are you always helping him?" He whines, kicking childishly Hyesung's leg repeatedly.  
"I don't know what you're talking about."

The singer fails to look innocent though, and Minwoo pouts even more as Eric does aegyo, chanting a 'thanks Hyesungie~' in a disgustingly cute sing-song voice.

Minwoo hits him once to shut him up, then twice too for good measure, and soon resumes his whining. 

"I swear, I'm not playing with you two anymore. You always gang up on me!"  
"Come on, that's ridiculous! Don't be stupid Minwoo-ya~," Eric sings again cutely, ignoring him. 

Hyesung doesn't say anything, just coughs a little to hide his laugh, and Minwoo hits the chuckling leader again, several times. 

"Seriously! Why are you always bullying me?" He grumbles. "For an oil and water couple, you team up with each other way too often. Awkward my ass!"  
"You're overreacting," Hyesung scolds him lightly before taking a sip of his beer.  
"I'm just saying, why do you always come to his rescue?" Minwoo pouts again. "You never help me when we play video games, or anyone else for that matter. Just him! Why?"

Hyesung sneaks a glance at Eric, slightly blushing as he notices the leader's smug smirk. Their guilty reactions are not lost on Minwoo.

"Sometimes, you two really look suspicious you know. Like a couple who has just broken up," he says slowly, teasingly. "Are you sure you haven't dated each other before? Do you have anything to confess to me?"

Minwoo smirks as Hyesung chokes on his drink, his eyes widening.

"Are you crazy?" The singer stutters hastily, looking flustered. 

His pulse quickens and he doesn't dare to look in Eric's direction anymore, wondering if the leader currently thinks too about the kisses they shared a long time ago. Or maybe Eric has completely forgotten about them? 

Hyesung tries to ignore the pang in his heart at this possibility. It's stupid though. It's not like they ever really dated each other. A few, hormone-driven kisses don't mean anything.

Eric's words back then didn't have any meaning either. Or rather, he only certainly meant he liked him as a friend... who understood his embarrassing, raging, shameful hormones. 

After all, soon after their last kiss, once the awkwardness had somewhat faded, they both had started dating girls again. And if they remained a little awkward and hadn't talked about thoses kisses ever again, it was something to expect, wasn't it? Why would they bring up that again? 

It was just a passing thing. Logic meant dating girls, and that's what they were both doing. 

Despite that logic, Hyesung knows he's been lying to himself all this time. Because, as hard as it is to admit it, bringing a girlfriend to his parents to prove that he's straight and then getting dumped by her for not giving a damn about their relationship is just pitiful. 

Because, after years of denial, he finally accepted the fact that he is in love with another man. With Eric. A man who will break his heart soon or later for good. Certainly sooner than later.

"Talking about dating," Minwoo continues, turning to Eric with a huge smile. "How are things going with your girlfriend? Have you proposed her yet? It's about time, don't you think?"

Despite himself, Hyesung freezes slightly and his throat suddenly feels dry at Minwoo's words.

Eric has been dating the beautiful Park Siyeon for around two years now, and the Shinhwa members never miss the chance to tease him about it, and even though Hyesung forces himself to go along with it, joking with the other members, his heart is slowly dying inside. 

He doesn't want to know about the details of their relationship. He doesn't want to know if they're headed towards marriage. Yet, he knows it's inevitable and that he has to prepare his heart to prevent it from falling apart completely. Among the Shinhwa members, Eric is the most likely to get married soon. Very soon. 

His heart is pounding in his chest when Eric finally speaks.

"Actually... We broke up."

Hyesung doesn't know how to breathe anymore. He hasn't expected that. It's an understatement to say that Minwoo looks surprised as well. 

"What? Wait, what? I thought you were practically married already. Who broke up? When? What happened?"  
"She did. Three months ago. And it just happened, that's all," Eric says with a shrug.  
"What do you mean 'that's all'?" Minwoo nearly shrieks. "And three months ago!? Why didn't you tell us?"

Hyesung finally glances at Eric. The leader looks rather unconcerned about it all as he shrugs again in answer, and the singer can't help but stare in wonder. 

They don't usually talk about the intimate aspects of their private life together yet he surely would have guessed that something was happening, wouldn't he? But Hyesung hasn't noticed anything strange these past few months in the leader's behavior. Nothing at all. If Eric has been sad or depressed because of his break up, he certainly has hidden it well, because Hyesung is attentive. Very attentive. And he hasn't seen that coming.

Eric came as often as before to visit him – quite often really as they're neighbors now, despite not being compelled to sharing a dorm anymore – mainly to talk about Shinhwa related matters and to play video games with him. 

Well, maybe that was the problem, as the Shinhwa members kept telling him.

"What are you doing?" Eric frowns when Minwoo starts to type frenetically on his phone.  
"Telling the other guys," Minwoo answers distractedly. "Why didn't you say anything? We could have supported you sooner. Get drunk together or something."

Eric doesn't wait to swiftly steal his phone, ignoring Minwoo's immediate whining.

"I told Andy," he replies calmly.  
"Why only him?" Minwoo mutters jealously.

Hyesung feels jealous too. Even though they talk a lot together, Eric tends to confide in Andy more than him. But he realizes that he's being unfair, as he himself tends to confide in Junjin more than he does in Eric. Well, only because it would feel too... intimate to tell him everything. Despite yearning for a close relationship with Eric, certain things remain too awkward between them. Things like... the memory of a kiss.

"What happened?" Minwoo insists.

Eric doesn't answer right away.

"Same old story," he admits after a while.  
"I told you before, you have to take better care of your girlfriends." Minwoo says, sighing deeply. "You have to pay attention to them, spend more time with them than with your buddies," he adds emphatically.

He points at a Hyesung to emphasize his words and the singer blushes with embarrassment as Eric's eyes scrutinize him.

"I know it's not easy with our schedules but... if we don't make any effort, none of us will get married before our retirement!" Minwoo whines again, looking more than a little depressed. 

Hyesung can't help but sigh too.

"Minwoo, don't be like that..."  
"You're no better!" Minwoo cuts him off theatrically, suddenly scolding the singer too. "Haven't you been single for more than a year already? What about all those blind dates?" 

Hyesung only stutters, making Minwoo huff and point his finger at them accusingly.

"You know what, you're both hopeless! So maybe you really should try and date each other!"

Still grumbling angrily about his dumb and dumber friends, Minwoo turns his head toward the tv set and resumes the game first, silently followed by his two blushing fellow members. 

***

_One hour later..._

Feeling exhausted, Hyesung sighs and pouts, remembering thoughtfully Minwoo's scolding.

"What's wrong with him?" he mumbles to himself, fiddling with his hoodie's strings.

Minwoo just left after venting out all his frustration, winning three games in a row, and only Eric is remaining with him. They're still playing even if it's already the evening and the room slowly goes dark around them. 

Minwoo's words keep resounding in his head, and he's glad that the darkness hides the blush on his face. 

_Maybe you really should try and date each other!_

His thoughts are running in circles and it's never a good thing. Especially when Eric is watching him carefully.

"You look tired."

Hyesung smiles weakly.

"Let's just take a break. Wanna eat something?" 

Eric nods, and barely sharing a few words, they go to the kitchen and start preparing some food. The atmosphere is slightly awkward, less comfortable than usual as they're both deep into thought.

Absent-mindedly boiling some water, Hyesung suddenly realizes that despite Minwoo's antics, they've really had a nice day. They have made an habit of spending entire days like this, hanging out with friends or just the two of them, and sharing dinners together. Nothing fancy but it always feels so nice and domestic, like what real couples usually do. 

Hyesung blushes at the dangerous thought and spends the dinner avoiding Eric's eyes. He can't help but steal glances at his unusually silent best friend though, and their questioning eyes meet each time, sending electricity down his spine. 

He gulps down another beer as they return in the living room and plop down on the couch. Before Hyesung can grab the gamepad and resume their game though, Eric's hand catches his wrist.

"What are you doing?" Hyesung asks quietly, staring at him in confusion.

Eric just looks at him for a while in silence, and Hyesung is too tired to even get annoyed at his lack of answer. Also, Eric looks extremely serious and it definitely starts to render him nervous. 

Hyesung nearly freaks out when Eric suddenly comes closer – way too close for comfort – and his thumb starts tracing circles on his wrist.

"Eric..." He warns him, trying but failing to wriggle away for much needed personal space as Eric still firmly holds his wrist.  
"Should we try?" The leader finally says.

The singer is even more confused.

"Try what?"  
"Dating," Eric says softly. 

Hyesung doesn't know if he heard correctly. 

"What?" he repeats stupidly, before laughing awkwardly after a few seconds, nervously.

The question doesn't compute in his brain. It doesn't make any sense. 

"Are you crazy?" He manages to stutter in a desperate attempt to keep his own sanity.  
"Am I?" Eric asks him calmly. "I might be but I don't care."

Hyesung just stares at him, and Eric lowers his head. His next words are even more confusing, sounding like an apology to his ears. 

"I know it's certainly too late, I should have asked you sooner, years ago actually... but I also know we both tried to fight it during all this time..."  
"What are you talking about?" Hyesung knows, but he asks anyway, already trembling and dizzy, aware that Eric can feel his guiltily rapid pulse against his fingers. 

When Eric's eyes look up into his, they're terribly sad. 

"I'm not sure if I can go on like this anymore. Hurting each other like this... I just need to know if there might be a chance for us."

The breeze is colder than earlier, and Hyesung shivers and freezes when Eric leans in carefully.

When their lips touch, it's nothing like their previous kisses. It's soft and hesitant, loving and romantic, and as the kiss deepens slowly, barely, as if they're both scared to taste a new territory, Hyesung finally sobs. 

"I'm sorry," he whispers when their mouths part. 

Leaning back a little, Eric caresses his face, wiping away the warm tears on his cheek. 

"I'm sorry I still like you," Hyesung finishes.

Eric's eyes are glistening as he smiles gently before leaning in again, murmuring against his lips.

"It's okay. I still like you too."

The game is forgotten as they resume their kiss. 

TBC...


	6. Paper kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long overdue chapter ^^;

As soon as Eric pulls over at the parking lot, Hyesung mulls over their romantic but silly idea. 

Actually, he's so nervous he nearly asks Eric to go back to their aparment complex on the spot, but he tries to calm himself. After all, it's their very first official date since they've started dating, a fortnight ago, so who cares if it's a little bit risky? 

Biting his lower lip, Hyesung gets lost in his anxious thoughts, and he starts a little when he feels Eric's hand on his shoulder, caressing and squeezing it lightly.

"Are you alright?"

Hyesung nods, and Eric smiles a little, his bright, excited eyes making the singer feel guilty about all the doubts he's having.

It's already past 5pm when they both go out of the car and stretch a little. Hyesung's face is fully covered with his cap, sunglasses and mask, but his style definitely doesn't look out of place here. After all, a huge majority of the Seoulites avoids the sun like the plague so they won't tan. But if Hyesung wears them today, it's mainly to not be recognized. 

What will people say if they see them here, together?

"Come on, let's go renting the bikes," Eric says with an easy smile. 

Hyesung nods again and they take their bags, full of food and refreshments, before heading for the renting shop. 

Even though it's a weekday, they're clearly not the only ones who had the very same idea to go biking at Yeouido Hangang Park, and as they queue to rent their bikes, Hyesung adjusts nervously his cap, hoping that no one recognizes them. It's likely though, as Eric is only wearing a cap and sunglasses, leaving bare most of his famous face. 

There are only couples around them, and for the umpteenth time that day, he wonders what people would think if they knew that the two Shinhwa members were going to go biking together on the Yeouido island. a very well-known dating place for couples. 

Hyesung starts a little when Eric whispers suddenly into his ear, his chin resting on this shoulder and his hands wandering on his waist. 

"Shall we take a tandem bike?" he says with a teasing smile.

Hyesung blushes under his mask at the funny suggestion and wriggles away from his touch.

"Wh- what nonsense are you saying?" he stutters, definitely looking at anything but the man. 

Around them he starts to notice a few girls – with their friends and boyfriends – sending them curious looks and whispering with each other, and he just knows they recognized them. 

He tenses up immediately, his arms crossed in defense, and Eric must have sensed it too because he doesn't say anything more and behaves until it's their turn. 

The busy bike rental shop assistant looks distractedly at them.

"Hello, a tandem bike I presume?" the man asks them lazily.

Hyesung is too stunned to answer, but Eric chuckles. The singer will swear later that he did hear a few girly giggles in the queue behind them as well.

"No, just two mountain bikes for two hours, please," Eric corrects him.

The assistant doesn't even blink at his mistake and lets them choose their bikes. By the time they're out of the shop, away from the crowd, Hyesung's face is beet red under his mask. He hasn't said anything yet, but Eric obviously knows what he's thinking. 

"I guess we must really look like a couple," he can't help but tease him again, amused at the whole thing.

Hyesung pushes his arm lightly to shut him up, but he doesn't say anything, hiding a little smile behind his mask. As they mount their bikes, Eric calls him softly. 

"Hey."  
"Hm, what?" Hyesung says, looking unsuspectingly at him. 

Eric leans in, closer and closer, and Hyesung freezes, staring at the man as if he's crazy. He's not gonna... is he? Hyesung might be wearing a mask, but there are people around them – people who recognized them – who would definitely see it. 

But before Hyesung can think of avoiding those pretty lips or even say something, they curl into an amused smile.

"Race you!"

And before he can react, Eric is gone, pedalling madly on the cycle track. Hyesung swears, barely remembering not to yell Eric's unfamous name. 

"Wait, you... Yah! That's cheating!" he complains loudly while chasing after him. 

***

After biking around the small isle for a good hour, they finally stop in an isolated part of the park to picnic. Hyesung is feeling more relaxed now and doesn't even say anything as Eric keeps hovering over him and touching him affectionately, helping him to take the food and the drinks out of their bags. 

They're talking comfortably as they eat, and Hyesung gradually forgets to check their surroundings every two minutes. It looks like no one has been paying them any attention since they left the rental shop anyway. Hyesung's thoughts wander as he feeds Eric some yummy side dishes. In fact it's really starting to feel like a real date and it's...

"It's nice," Eric suddenly says, echoing his thoughts. 

Surprised, Hyesung glances at him, and nodds slightly, humming in agreement. 

When they finish eating, Hyesung sats back, even more relaxed as he hugs his knees, Eric close at his side. They look at the river, silent for a while as they listen to the strong wind, when Hyesung feels a soft kiss on his cheek followed by another one that lingers on his neck. Eric leans on him afterwards, setting his head on his shoulder. Despite his nervousness, Hyesung just lets him do as he pleases, appreciating the shivers brought by the tender touching.

"Let's go fishing next time," Eric says after a peaceful moment, closing his eyes as Hyesung's fingers try to tame an unruly lock of hair falling on his forehead.  
"Next time?" Hyesung muses.  
"Yeah, then we could go hiking the next time, or even do a trip in Japan."

Hyesung feels overwhelmed at the thought of future, potentially romantic dates, and he blinks away nascent tears. He could hardly believe this could work. Let alone see a real future for them. But if Eric is willing to try and believe in them, he will try too. 

Hooking his arms around one of his thin legs, Eric looks up when he doesn't say anything.

"Or we can just go to a public bath," he mutters happily, smiling a little. "Like, after one of your solo concerts. I swear it's the perfect way to recharge one's batteries."  
"You know that I don't like public baths," Hyesung automatically mumbles back, looking shy.  
"They have private baths too. We wouldn't be disturbed while we... Well, you know."

Hyesung blushes. Was that an innuendo for...

"Aish, you pervert!" He hisses, hitting the Shinhwa leader's head with his knuckles.  
"Ouch, what? I didn't mean it that way! Not exactly anyway," Eric amends, laughing before adding cheekily. "I mean, we can have another kind of bath at home too if you want."

Hyesung's cheeks turn crimson, and he avoids Eric's bright eyes as the man straightens up to have a better look at his reaction. They haven't done anything too intimate yet. Even kissing each other remains awfully awkward somehow as the two best friends have not adjusted to their new relationship yet. But... Hyesung wants it too. He wants that man he loves. Badly.

He really doesn't have to lean in that much to kiss him. A sweet, wet kiss that seems to surprise Eric. The man kisses him back after a few seconds though, until some approaching voices interrupt the spell and Hyesung leans back, looking dazed and flustered by his own forwardness. 

"W-we should go. Our two hours are nearly up."

Embarrassed, the singer doesn't look at him as he grabs his mask, putting it on before standing up unsteadily. 

Eric pouts a little, managing to look disappointed and pleased at the same time as he throws a puppy look at the blushing man. 

"Okay," he gives in, sighing as he stands up too.

The people who interrupted them pass by and disappear while they pack the scraps of their collation and soon, too soon to Hyesung's liking, they're straddling their bikes side by side, ready to come back to the rental shop and leave the sweet scenery. 

Unmoving, Hyesung is still staring at the river when Eric's calling him again.

"Hey."  
"Hm?" The singer mumbles, turning his head towards him. 

As he did earlier, Eric leans in slowly, as if to kiss him, and Hyesung frowns, squeezing the handlebars of his bike, ready to take off. 

"Don't think I'm going to fall for it again," he warns Eric, huffing the words behind his mask and puffing his cheeks.  
"Cute," Eric says with a smile before diving in.

It's a little weird, kissing through some fabric like they did many times in the past, playing the paper game for TV shows, but it's strangely romantic under the setting sun, Hyesung realizes.


End file.
